We know for sure that we can’t change the external life stressors that affect our mind on a daily basis. Life goes on and there is not much we can do about what is happening around us.
But fortunately, we can have control over our own mind. Here lays our POWER.
Commonly an external stressor triggers an immediate, spontaneous reaction in our mind.
That reaction comes from our emotional brain called amygdala.The prefrontal cortex (logical brain) is still turned off, as it usually needs more time to log back into the system. So when we encounter a stressor an immediate, often emotional reaction happens.
The good news is that we can influence this mechanism.
We can create SPACE between the stressor and the response to it – it will no longer be a reaction then.
There are many ways of creating this space that I usually work with my clients on. It should include mindset shift and a daily practice, as when introduced collectively they can produce a much greater effect.
One of the most important mindset shifts is: “Let go of what you cannot control”
I know it’s easy to say, but let’s explore this for a moment…
Your life consist of 2 elements in this respect:
- what you can influence and
- what you cannot control.
No matter what we do, nothing will change it. That’s how it is.
That is why it is so important to realise and accept it.
The rule, that I personally apply in all life situations, that seem to look like a challenge in the future (future emotion are those giving us most fear and anxiety) is:
“I will worry when I have this problem” or “I will cross this bridge when I get to it” .
We so often worry even before there is a problem.
This approach, of course, will not change the future stressor, but it will allow us to operate from a space of calm and focus, which may change our response and way of acting.
We must remember that life, in the general sense of the word, is beyond our control. So it is good to learn to let go and trust in what awaits us. That all will be good for us.
So how do you let go?
Focus on what you can influence.
Stick to your routine.
Move forward in small steps, without looking too far into the future.
Have faith and trust.
I know that faith, trust and hope are less tangible concepts, but very important.
It’s a bit like breathing, when we exhale completely, we have full faith that the next inhalation will come soon, but are we sure of this? NO! We don’t think about it, we trust that it will happen, so we don’t even stress with each exhalation… and that’s exactly the kind of trust we need in life 🙂 it changes a lot what comes to us, believe me…
So, in moments of challenge, remember to ground your attention in your body, feel your feet on the floor, open your chest, notice your breathing and take a few longer breaths that will help create that inner space from which you can respond rather than react and trust the Universe, in the highest and best outcome for you.
I am attaching a short 5-min practice of extended exhalations that can help you create that inner space.
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